Friday, November 05, 2004

UptoParents.com

I have posted about this site before but I want to make sure that this information is easily accessible, so I am going to talk about it again. To that end, I will be putting a permanent link to the site under links.

If you are in any stage of the divorce/custody process, particularly if it is contentious, this is a wonderful place to visit. What it contains is a series of questions that both you and your spouse (ex or otherwise) fill out in regard to the care of your children. I will warn you now, it is a lengthy process. But it will help you sort out some of the contentious feelings you are having and help you to focus on what is most important - your child or children.

If you are just beginning this process this can be a wonderful asset to help try and put the breaks on too much litigation, etc before it starts. But it will help refocus and center you, whatever stage you may find yourself in. Encourage your ex to fill it out on their own. Hopefully they will, but even if they refuse, you will be better for the time you spent. After you have both filled it out, try to have a civil conversation about what you have accomplished. Share it with any mediators or evaluators you are seeing, talk to your family about your experience...

BUT ABOVE ALL - IF YOU TAKE THE TIME TO DO THE EXERCISES - TAKE THEM SERIOUSLY!! IF YOU AREN'T INTERESTED IN MAKING THIS HORRIFIC SITUATION AS EASY AS POSSIBLE FOR YOUR CHILDREN-DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME

We do a lot of talking here about unfair laws, fathers rights, abuse of the system, etc.... At the end of the day, however, the true goal is to help kids get through divorce with as little conflict as possible and to have equal access to both of their parents after a split.

UpToParents.com

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